I have been feeling very lonely and isolated since my recent bad church experience. I’d been visiting a local church and thoroughly enjoying the kindness of the people and the truth preached from the pulpit. However, it all came to a crashing halt when I was called before the elders to discuss my divorce and my “justification” for being the one to actually file the legal documents. The wounds from that cut deeply into my already bruised spirit.
This morning, as I walked with my dogs and marveled at the beauty of that place between the overnight rain and the promise of a sunny day, I prayed about my loneliness. I sang the Casting Crowns tune to the scripture “I lift my eyes unto the hills. Where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, maker of Heaven and Earth.” And, then I hurried off to Chi Gung.
I have felt a little guilty about taking Chi Gung. It was highly recommended by my chiropractor and my massage therapist to help in dealing with my trauma related health issues, but I realize that it has some Eastern mysticism attached to it. I’ve been sitting and practicing next to a delightful woman with whom I seem to have a lot in common. We’ve discussed our large families, home schooling, and breastfeeding. Today she suddenly turned to me and asked, “Do you believe in God?” I quickly discovered we have even more in common than I had realized! Here was a little surprise antidote from God for my loneliness–a fellow believer learning Chi Gung alongside me. My guilt over it dissipated, and I was glad to be there.
Not long after returning home I received a text from a friend. She and her family were on their way to my house with wood. I’ve been worried because I know I’m at least a cord short, and the place I rent only has a wood stove for heat. Their boys and one of my sons unloaded the wood while we adults enjoyed a hot cup of coffee and the warmth of conversation possible with old and comfortable relationships. The kids finished quickly, and we watched them telling stories, playing in the yard, and playing music together. It was so nice to get to enjoy their company for the afternoon. It was another surprise antidote from God for my loneliness.
This evening as I ponder the events of the day I am reminded…….I lift my eyes unto the hills. Where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, maker of Heaven and Earth……and I smile.